Marriage: Yours, Mine, or His?

To start off, I have always been in love with the idea of marriage. Just the thought of sharing my life with someone sounded pretty awesome to me. But earlier tonight, I stumbled upon a shared article, on my Facebook newsfeed, that got me thinking. The title read, "A Case for Early Marriage: Why It's a Good Idea to Get Married Young." I read it, of course, because I couldn't resist a title like that. 

The article by Justin Deeter put up some pretty relatable points on why people of the Christian Faith should not scare their children away from getting married early on in life. To me, his points were both valid and invalid and here is why: 

I believe Deeter may be a Baptist because he makes three points: 

1. Marriage is a great gift.
2. Marriage forces people to grow up.
3. Marriage protects from sexual immorality. 

So, number one I totally agree with. Marriage is definitely a gift from God. In Genesis 2, it states that God knew it was not good for Adam to be without a "suitable helper." (NIV) To solve this, God made a woman, Eve, and brought her to Adam and joined them. Now, maybe it's just me, but to have the second chapter in all of scripture to contain a wedding, marriage has to be important to God. This story is also repeated by Jesus in Mark 10:6-9.

 "But at the beginning of creation God 'made them male and female.' 'For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife,  and the two will become one flesh.' So they are no longer two, but one. Therefore what God has joined together, let man not separate." 

God saw, and still sees, that we need companionship to thrive. Not just in the expansion of the human race, but to thrive in emotional, physical, and mental areas of our lives. 

Number 2 is disputable. Not all people grow up, period, much less in a marriage. Yet, any kind of responsibility almost always kick starts a persons' maturity. A lack of responsibility in my generation is what brought the word "adolescence" into existence. Not once in the Bible does it mention an adolescent stage. Adolescence is merely made up by our cultures' low expectation for its own future leaders. For this I looked to 1 Corinthians 13:11.

"When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put the ways of childhood behind me."

So, when exactly does one become an adult? I believe the timing is different for everyone, but it should not take something as serious as marriage to rocket a boy into his manhood.

Number three is understandable but also disputable. In ancient Jewish culture, men and women were married in early youth. As time went on we came to the point where we now have people being married as late as their mid-thirties. This prolongation of entering a marital covenant, along with a sexually driven culture, produces premarital sexual relations, which do not honor God. (Hebrews 13:4) But, this should not mean that we should switch to the old way of marrying early to solve our problem. It means that we should guard our hearts from sexual immorality and beg God to intervene with the flesh.

I think it is safe to say that God deals with all of His children differently. If one of the faith is lead by God to marry another of the faith, and they are both young (early 20s), be their encouragement. Do not hinder them from what God has called them to do with statements like "Aren't you a little too young for that?" or "Get ready for the ball and chain!" However, it is definitely the loving, Christian thing to do to make sure they are making the right, God influenced, decisions. Also, if a person of the faith has been called not to be married, do not discourage them with words like "It's getting a little late, don't ya think?"

Another way I have been encouraged tremendously on the subject of marriage is by already-married couples making an impact on my life. My parents, friends, and many leaders of the church have poured into me the excitement and love they experience everyday in their marriages, both new and mature. If you are married, strive to be a couple that makes my generation excited for our own days spent in matrimony. Inform us of the importance and responsibilities of marriage and the major role in advancing God's kingdom it plays. But, also tell us of the perks and happiness it brings. Remember, we lead by example!

To close, marriage is a serious contract that a man and a woman partake in. Ultimately, it is put together by God, therefore it belongs to God. He will tell His child the right time and if they are to be married. Not that I am a marital expert or even a relationship expert, because I mess up a lot. But while spending the last four years building my relationship with Christ, my biggest help has come from encouragement from others in the faith. So, here's my proposition: instead of going with what society thinks is best, not only with marital decision but any kind of decision, why don't we encourage each other to listen to God, instead.

For more info on Justin Deeter's article, here is the URL: http://www.justindeeter.com/archives/1345

Phil Robertson: Stomping on Eggshells

I think it is easy to say that Phil Robertson became the most talked about person, today. The hit TV-show star was interviewed by GQ magazine, and to my knowledge, was asked about his beliefs. Robertson was straight forward when asked to elaborate on his views:

"Everything is blurred on what's right and what's wrong… Sin becomes fine," he said. Start with homosexual behavior and just morph out from there. Bestiality, sleeping around with this woman and that woman and that woman and those men."

He then went on to paraphrase 1 Corinthians 6:9-11:

"Do you not know that the wicked will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: Neither the sexually immoral nor idolaters nor adulterers nor male prostitutes nor homosexual offenders nor thieves nor drunkards nor slanderers nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God. And that is what some of you were. But you were washed, you were sanctified, you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of our God." - 1 Corinthians 6:9-11 

His views on homosexuality offended many in support of and in the gay community and of course they boycotted A&E. Due to this, A&E suspended the Duck Commander, indefinitely, saying Phil's views did not match up with theirs.

But before we get all worked up, lets look at Phil's reference to scripture. As listed above, in 1 Corinthians 6:9-11, it points out homosexuality is a sin, plain and simple. Does God love these people? OF COURSE! They're His children and the sin of homosexuality does not separate a person and God. But, what does separate a person from God is a person's failure to accept His son, Jesus Christ, as the lord of their life. The problem is, if homosexuality has been chosen to become a lifestyle and is no longer a mere tempation for a person, odds are, they aren't following Christ. This I also get from 1 Corinthians 6:9-11 when it mentions "...the wicked will not inherit the kingdom of God," directly after this it mentions that "homosexual offenders," among others, will not inherit the kingdom of God.

Let's be ADD for a second, shall we? Let's say it's 12am one night and you're on this diet that says you can't eat anything after 8pm. You suddenly feel this urge to get up and go get a midnight snack and you remember theres a piece of chocolate cake sitting on the counter. Instead of putting it out of your head and going to sleep like you should have two hours ago, you let yourself think about it. You think how satisfied that piece of chocolate cake would make you and how great it'll taste. You'll start to make excuses like "It's just one slice; I can still lose weight only if I eat one." You walk to the kitchen and you see it. You know its wrong and you've been doing so good on your diet but you deserve a treat right? You get your single slice of chocolate cake and devour it in about 2 seconds. Maybe another. You eat your second slice of cake and then you blink. You look up and the cake is gone! You've eaten the whole cake. Ugh, it just tasted soooo good! A couple days later you step on the scales and you've not gotten anywhere, you haven't gained but you surely haven't lost. All that hard work and a little splurge. This is ridiculous! You decide, if you haven't lost then you'll just give up. You keep eating chocolate cake and other awesome, but really unhealthy foods and then you wake up and your fifty pounds heavier and way less attractive.

Sin is the same way and I believe that is what Phil Robertson meant in his first statement. Sin grows and becomes worse. By thinking about sin and obsessing over it, like you did with the chocolate cake, we, with the deceiver in our ears, decide to just try it once. That one time turns out to be satisfying and theres not too much of a consequence, so why not a second time? That second time turns into multiple times until it gets out of hand. And when it gets out of hand, no matter what, there is always a consequence, no matter what sin you're dabbling in. This can be traced back to the first sin of Adam and Eve in Genesis 3. Though God told them not to eat of the tree of knowledge, Adam and Eve let the serpent's words deceive them and did not remember God's command. Their consequence: banishment from the Garden of Eden, and even worse, a life separated from their Father. To atone for this, God gave up His only son, so that we might live.

If we believe that God is a merciful and loving God, enough that he sent his Son to die a horrible death for our sake, how do we not also believe what Phil Robertson referenced in 1 Corinthians? After all, we get both ideas from the same book. That's like saying Harry Potter doesn't have a scar on his forehead. But it was in the book… and the movie. We can no longer pick and choose what we think is right from God's Word. Either we believe it or we don't. Either a person is a Christ follower or they're not. We as christians have to stop walking on eggshells every time we are asked what we believe. I admire Phil Robertson for standing up for what the bible says and stomping on those stupid, politically correct eggshells. And if you don't believe God's word, Phil Robertson's statements, and also this article of writing, should not bother you, because, after all, isn't it just a stupid religion? Everyone is free to practice their own beliefs and their right to free speech, that is merely what Robertson was doing. If we are to call ourselves Christians, we are subject to God's point of view and Phil Robertson stood up for God's point of view. Which, I would be scared to do. Especially if I had millions to risk, like the Robertson clan, yet they preach the gospel anyway.

Since we follow God's point of view, like Phil, we believe the sin of homosexuality is wrong. But, we also believe that we are supposed to love every person no matter what is going on or has gone on in their life.

"The second is this: 'Love your neighbor as yourself.' There is no commandment greater than these." - Mark 12:31

To add to this, we are certainly not to judge a persons sin because in God's eyes, if we have committed a sin, it is just as bad as homosexuality.

"For whoever keeps the whole law and yet stumbles at just one point is guilty of breaking all of it." - James 2:10

My sin was what kept Jesus on that cross. He was tortured because I fall short every day. My short comings are that of bestiality and murder. There is no possible way for me to ever be good enough for God. But thankfully, I have a Savior, and instead of seeing my mistakes, God sees Jesus in me. Thank God for that and thank God for people like Phil Robertson that fire us up and bring us together as a Christ following body.